Do you have sexual challenges that you would like help in over-coming?
If you are a man this could include difficulty in giving your partner the quality of intimate interaction and attention that she wants, problems with meeting, or arousing, her sexual needs, premature ejaculation, trouble with getting or keeping an erection, lack of desire, trouble with going beyond a certain level of sexual arousal and culminating in orgasm.
For Men’s Sexual Problems, click here
If you are a woman, your sexual challenges could include: inadequate skills in how to stimulate your partner, difficulty in getting aroused or staying present to the intimate experience with your partner, problems with orgasming which could include rare or weak orgasms or no orgasms at all, only being aroused by a very narrow range of stimulation, having little knowledge of your own body and hence having difficulty in communicating to your partner what he needs to do to successfully arouse you.
For Women’s Sexual Problems, click here
Tantra does help solve these sexual problems to the extent that they are psychologically rather than physically based, which they often are. If they are physically based, supplements for sexual health, aphrodisiacs, hormonal solutions, and alternative health programs can be recommended. Check out our Sexual Health section. Even when your sexual problems are physically based,Tantra will help optimize those aspects of your sexuality that are not physically compromised, and thus can lead to a significant and striking improvement.
For Sexual Problems Common to Men & Women, click here
Men’s Sexual Problems
- Getting or Maintaining An Erection
Erectile dysfunction may be psychologically based, physically based, a product of the relationship, or any mixture of these causes. When it is psychologically based Tantra plus some counseling can turn the problem around. When it is a by-product of the relationship, moving on the path of conscious relationship can resolve this problem. When it is physically based, sexual health solutions may be available and make a very significant difference. However, even when erectile dysfunction is physically based, Tantra can help. This is because through Tantra you can learn to flood your body with sexual energy and become orgasmic – with or without an erection. You can also learn to deal with the performance anxiety that naturally accompanies erectile dysfunction – and can even cause it.
- Achieving Ejaculation
Just as some women have trouble letting go in orgasm, so some men have trouble letting go in ejaculation. Tantra takes the emphasis off ejaculation and puts it on orgasm. Through Tantra a man can learn to experience full body orgasm and multiple orgasm without ejaculating. When this is the case the importance of the ejaculation dissolves. When ejaculation becomes an irrelevant issue the psychological barriers to experiencing it disappear, thereby ultimately enabling the ejaculatory response to re-emerge.
- Premature Ejaculation
Most men have this problem to some degree or another, whether they last for a few seconds, a few minutes or 10 to 20 minutes after entering their partner. As most women require about an hour of arousing intercourse to have an orgasm, for most women most men are premature ejaculators. Tantra can teach almost all men premature ejaculation mastery. It is a learnable skill in the same way as driving a car, or any other mind body reflex, is a learnable skill. It takes instruction, guidance and then a period of consistent practice until the new programming becomes second nature.
The manner in which Tantra teaches premature ejaculation control is such that in the process the man learns to experience full body orgasm, more intense orgasm, multiple orgasm, and develops the capacity to separate orgasm from ejaculation. This enables him to have simultaneous orgasm with his partner. It also enables him to get out of his head and into his body and focus on his pleasure and on his partners reactions. He no longer has to distract himself with the monitoring and diminishing of his arousal level as all this is now an automatic mind-body reflex. This enables him to be more present and responsive to his partner and to the sexual/spiritual moment, thereby becoming a more wonderful lover.
- Being Orgasmic or have Powerful Orgasms
Unless a man has health problems that effect him sexually, it is often the case that men who can’t ejaculate, or who have small, short orgasms, are too much in their head during intercourse. They are worried about coming too fast or not coming at all and concerned about pleasing their partner. They try too hard either to withhold their ejaculation or to ejaculate. It is a form of performance anxiety.
If this is the case, the Intimate Passionate Love Tantric method of teaching Ejaculation Mastery and Full Body Orgasm can help . The techniques you learn prevent you from being in your head and teach you to flood your body with your sexual energy, over and over again, at higher and higher levels of arousal. This leads to full body orgasm. This Tantric approach also helps because you learn how to have orgasm without ejaculating. Once you have learned this then you are capable of multiple orgasms and become a multi orgasmic lover. You also learn to understand, and communicate to your partner, the unimportance of ejaculation compared to orgasm – especially full body orgasm. Thus, the pressure to ejaculate is lifted, making it both less valued and more possible.
- Attitudes that under value and misunderstand Sex
The attitude of some men toward sex presents a problem both to themselves and to their partner. Sex is regarded as a release, a let go. It is used to relax or for the sake of the orgasm. Sex is not used to express love and experience a powerful, exciting, bonding interaction their partner. These men do not open their hearts in sex or consider sex as a spiritual experience. This leads to an insensitive way of love-making that turns their partner away from sex with them and deprives both them and their partner of the magnificent emotionally and spiritually uplifting experience that erotic sex can be. Tantra is a perfect training to correct and transform such attitudes towards sex and to replace them with attitudes that open men, and their partners, to intimate, passionate and sacred sex.
Women’s Sexual Problems
- Woman’s Orgasm
Orgasm problems can take many forms. Perhaps you have not yet had an orgasm, or don’t know if what you have is an orgasm or not, or keep riding the peak but never quite fall into the orgasmic abyss.
Or perhaps you have experienced orgasm but can rarely get there, or have difficulty getting there, or get there too rarely for yourself and your partner. Or perhaps there is only a very narrow range of stimulation that can bring you to orgasm. This will create a certain repetitiveness in your sexual experiences, leading to a lack of novelty, spontaneity and excitement in your sex life. Perhaps you have orgasms but they are little orgasms, just a weak wave of orgasmic energy or a sudden short orgasmic release that is focused in your clitoris and doesn’t pervade you.
Some woman have wonderful orgasms but yearn to experience more of their full orgasmic potential. They may wish to try different sexual experiences or to develop the capacity for Female Ejaculation – and without this they are not content.
Whatever the orgasmic problem that a woman is dealing with Tantra holds a solution to – unless it is a physiological problem resulting from sexual health issues. Tantra teaches you to feel the sensations in your body, to spread your sexual energy throughout your body, peaking it repeatedly. Tantra teaches you to get out of your head and to surrender. Tantra teaches you how to experience full body orgasm, multiple orgasm, and extended orgasm. Tantra teaches you to experience the union of your sexual and spiritual energies, to merge them with your partners sexual and spiritual energies, and to peak together in ecstatic Tantric orgasm.
- Conditioned Negative Attitudes Towards Sex
Many woman have a negative beliefs and attitudes toward sex as a result of their family upbringing, religion, culture, or negative past sexual experiences. Counseling can help you identify the source of these beliefs and attitudes and reassess their applicability in your current life. Tantra can help you develop a new perspective on sensuality and sex. Through Tantra you will learn to understand the healthy dimensions of the sexual part of your life and to experience it in a spiritual context that uplifts both you and your relationship.
- Sexual Pain
Sexual pain is usually associated with vaginismus or post menopausal or cancer related estrogen deficiency. – See the section on Sexual Health.
- Lack of Sexual Skills in Knowing How to Best Arouse A Man
Just as men are often not aware of what their touch feels like to their partner’s body and what it takes to truly arouse their partner, so women are often not aware of what it takes to arouse their partner. They may have a very limited range of strokes or positions they are willing to be in and may not be able to interact with their partner in a way that is truly arousing. They may be aware of this and feel inadequate or they may be unaware of it and have no idea of the role they are playing in the unsatisfactory sex that is so disappointing to them (and their partner) – or is causing them to be disinterested in sex.
Sexual Problems Common to Men & Women
- Arousing Your Partner or Meeting His or Her Sexual Needs
When you are new, the biochemistry of two people who are attracted to each other takes care of arousal. It just happens. As a relationship ages, the biochemistry diminishes and arousal is more a factor of an intimate meeting of two souls who are in deep appreciation of each other and know the artful skills of sex. Men and women are not taught how to be this way. They are not given this knowledge. However the conditioning women receive during their upbringing makes them better equipped to be this way naturally – but not necessarily. Women can also have the problem of difficulty with arousing their man.
Tantra teaches both sexes how be with each other in a way that optimally supports arousal – through presence, consciousness, tantalizing Tantric Touch, and the movement, peaking and merging of sexual energies. It is a whole technology of sexual spiritual union. Conscious relationship coaching helps couples deal with the emotional fusion, relationship problems, communication issues, and co-dependency that detracts from the arousal that couples feel.
- Being Emotionally Intimate With Your Partner
Lack of emotional intimacy is usually associated with the man and not the woman. While it is a gender issue, we believe that it is more due to the man’s conditioning than to an innate lack of ability in this arena and that when a man becomes aware he is as capable of becoming more intimate as a woman is. Well, perhaps he has a little more of a challenge. However, the problem is not exclusively gender related. Women can also have this problem. Emotional intimacy requires that you know and like yourself and that you share who you really are, what you feel, how you live and want to live, and what you want with your partner. It requires that you do this in a way that is respectful and honoring. Both men and women can have difficulty with this.
The combination of Conscious Relationship and Tantra is amazingly helpful in this regard. In very different ways, both Tantra and Conscious Relationship teach you to take the risk to be your true self, regardless of your conditioning, and to express yourself, your thoughts, feelings, and desires, authentically, from the best in you to the best in your partner.
- Performance Anxiety
- Sexual Wounds
Sexual wounds are psychologically based trauma resulting from negative past experiences that close you down sexually in some way. They block you from experiencing sexual pleasure. Those blocks could be cutting you off from almost any sexual satisfaction and causing deep dissatisfaction on the part of yourself and your partner. They could be keeping you from the peak sexual experiences that you could otherwise have. They may be thwarting you in a multitude of different ways.
Counseling and Tantra are a powerful team when it comes to dealing with sexual wounds. Tantra teaches you to focus in a positive way on the sensations in your body, to move energy with your consciousness, to open your heart in deep appreciation and surrender. Male prostate massage and female g-spot massage can both be used, by an experienced practitioner, to help you to re-experience the painful feelings and to bring them into the conscious mind where they can be dealt with. It is then possible to let them go.
- Diminished Libido
It is here that Tantra can be most helpful. Tantra teaches you to be really present to your body and your partner so that you feel more. Together with conscious relationship counseling, Tantra is also helpful when low libido is caused by negative attitudes towards sex that result in sex becoming a very low priority or avoided altogether.
- Getting Turned On to Your Partner
Sometimes getting turned on is not an issue of libido. Other people outside your primary relationship may attract you and turn you on but not your partner. To the extent that this is an attitudinal problem caused by familiarity, relationship problems, and changes in physical appearance, a combination of conscious relationship counseling and Tantra can be very effective.
Tantra teaches you how to develop a mind set of focused presence and to appreciate yourself and your partner. It shows you how to create an ambiance that invites you to experience yourself and your partner as sexual/spiritual beings. Conscious relationship instruction teaches you to develop the psychological and life style attributes that are most conducive to being desirable to your partner. In the sexual health section we talk about one other factor that can be helpful and that is aphrodisiacs for both of you.
- Fetishes and Fantasies that you are Dependent on for Arousal and Orgasm
Fetishes and fantasies are a sexual problem when you are dependent on them for arousal and orgasm. One of the great gifts of Tantra is that it trains you to get out of your head and, with it, out of your memory and imagination. You become focused on your senses and learn how to move your sexual energy with your consciousness and to spread your sexual energy throughout your body. In this way your learn to rely in your own sexual sensations, and not the context in which they are experienced, for your arousal.
- Sexual Ignorance
We do not learn how to be good lovers. We are not taught how our anatomy’s work, how to make love to ourselves instead of “get off” through masturbation, and how to arouse our partner’s through touch, kissing, massage, and oral sex, or to bring our partner to fulfillment through intercourse. The woman is not taught what she needs to do and how to be with herself sexually in order to play her part in taking responsibility for her orgasm. The man is not taught how to give a woman the quality of attention that she needs to be close to him and how to touch her in ways that will bring her sexually alive. Modern neo Tantra teaches all of this.